It is often unusual that something hidden inside me wants to break out of its prison of impotence constituted by self-ignorance and the overall disappointment on humanity as a whole.
I have slowly come to realize that we are all too self-absorbed; our human nature prompts us to shine, and yet we shine in the most self-aggrandizing way. Our way of aggrandizing ourselves is often disguised as self-realization, and what worries me the most is that wars and conflicts happen because of the blurred boundary between genuine self-realization and self-deception.
The technological advancement has given us a platform to show who we are, and yet we choose to show to the world who we want to become. Everything is both curated and narrated to the extent that truth is lost, and egotism prevails. A question arises: whether we find solace only in the sea of deceptions and temporary gratifications, or whether we search for peace not to transcend the hustles and bustles of our daily mundane lives, but to escape from the fact that we are born empty and alone.
On a gross level, we want to be respected, so we appear to be as successful as we could be. We delve into the realm of pretense and deceit in order to survive and impress. For those with a more refined and subtle ego, they delve into the intellectual/philosophical realm just to convince themselves that they are a different person, a person who pursues a more superior path than others. No matter which situation we find ourselves in, there is one thing in common, which is that we do things just to appear as someone we are not, and along the way, how many precious things have we lost simply because we have changed for the “better”?
I guess, in the end, we are just craving creatures — individuals who don’t know what should be done to have a life worth dying for.