Why do we suffer the way we do? What is the meaning of life? And why does life, at times, burden us so much with nonsense, to the point where the thought of giving it up sometimes seems to be the last and desperate resort?
I have been pondering these questions for quite a long time, and many letters have been written to shed light on these matters. However, this is the second one I wish to share with you, especially my loved ones.
We always question things outside of us, as if our “self” is the static entity around which all else revolves. By “outside”, I also mean our thoughts, memories, intentions, ambitions, and the like, Yet. we seldom ask to whom these things arise. We seem to assume that our “self” persists while everything else is in constant flux. And it rarely occurs to us to question whether our usually perceived “self” is nothing more than these things.
We are afraid to dig deep into who we are, and we never seem to bother to ask the question. From my personal opinion, the reason for this is that the more we peel the onion, we might not be able to find who we are, because it is nothing. To me, achieving the state of nothingness is the God-given goal one can attain in this life because everyone is perpetually trying to become something.
We persist in our pursuits, striving just to remain unconscious of who we really are. Striving offers us purpose, something to cling to, allowing us to identify and assert that we are someone with a distinct specialty, and people can differentiate us from others. No matter which spectrum we are in, be it self-destruction or self-help, the common thread is that we continually mold ourselves to a particular pattern, hoping to present a “better” version of ourselves to the world, presentation at this point, precedes peacefulness and truth, and it seems to haunt humanity throughout its history. Unfortunately, we often stop short at presenting ourselves morally and socially, and we find it the ultimate goal of life, we seldom delve deep, we are fixated on patterns, and what these patterns can offer.
It no longer matters to me whether we are socially successful in this world. What matters now is the hope that humanity can progress without killing each other, without pushing other people into abyss just the sake of climbing that fucking illusional ladder. Can we progress without the need for identifications? As if we will perish without them. Can we progress without the fear of acknowledging that we are nothing and nothing? I am not suggesting isolation from the world. I am just questioning the motive behind all these endeavors. Can we be successful but remain non-competitive? Can we be rich without being mean? Can we be true without resorting to pretension? Can we strive without confining ourselves to the domain which we are striving for? Can we be religious without resorting to fanaticism, supremacism, and egotistical tactics?
Instead of the blind progress we obsess over, let’s strive for global peace. In a world where we can love each other sincerely. How? By doing things without attachment, recognizing that these actions do not in any way define who we are but are simply things we do, consequently, despite changes and sabotages by others, we can always maintain inner peace, because it is no longer a public statement to who we are.
When people ask about the meaning of life? I think the question is absolutely misleading. How can we have meaning, which is tremendously static, to something so versatile like life? I assume life has no meaning; it will have no meaning if we do not know who we are. Without understanding ourselves, what we identify with will always perish, and we will inevitably strive again to find something else until we die. In the end, people might condemn this as an utter bullshit, but, I guess, for them, inner peace and happiness are never the priorities.